On this, the second of three unlucky Fridays this year, Mike Chan of Shadow Finance kicked us off with the chilling news that there are less than 10% of the mortgage deals on offer now than there were this time last year. Mike is looking for folks having difficulties securing a mortgage in the light of that news.
Richard Houldsworth of Splatt Print, still worryingly too excited about his new machine, has been working with hotels and start-ups and wants more of the latter please.
Hiten Thakker of Revolution wants people rebranding, particularly if “their current branding is pants”.
Sanjeev Shah from HSBC may need to be more specific as he wants to speak to anyone currently not happy with their bank, which would currently include most of the population of the developed world, with the exception of HSBC clients. Sanjeev would like switchers.
Roy Duncan of RG Duncan tells us the key to his success in recruiting top accountancy staff is his guarantees of ability, suitability and sustainability. He would like to speak with HR Managers and HR Directors.
Alexis Garnaut-Miller of the Happiness Centre is majoring on onsite massage this week as a way of bringing happiness to the workplace. She would like to speak with HR Managers, Facilities Managers and Office Managers of call centres with 25 or more staff.
Paul Marmor presented Sherrards Solicitors to the group.
Gavin Morton-Holmes is looking to reduce the huge amount of litigation spend by construction companies by way of his Destiny plc digital pen and paper solution. He would like to speak with contacts at RIBA, RICS and CIBSE. Any other acronyms are welcome if there is the chance of a sale at the end of it.
Zoe Antin of Opus Telecom is looking for moving, growing or struggling companies and would like to discuss how she can save them money through their telephone systems. More on Zoe in our full colour supplement Zoe’s Ten Minutes.
Karelia Scott-Daniels of Manse & Garret Property Search told us how she has recently found for a client a 2 bedroom property, soon to be 3 bedroom, in Marylebone for just £485,000! I said I’d lost one and could she check for my name stitched inside.
Roy Block from Suits to Your Door will do exactly what he says on the tin. 35 years of experience will come to your office and home, and you should save around £100 off the price. His suits look great, but Richard Houldsworth is no Kate Moss.
Louise Mevillot told us how Sayers Butterworth are the accountants of your past, present and future and she would like to speak to anyone not getting value from using one of the top 30 accountancy firms.
Leigh Caldwell of Inon was Christian Ingerslev for just one minute. Christian’s Danesoft will survey your customers or your suppliers about anything you would like to know, starting at just £875. Christian would like to speak with anyone you know in the IT or Web teams at schools or universities.
George Metcalfe took a chance with a bloke called Clifford over lunch. His esteemed lawyer lunch companion made George realize that even the top earners in banking, City and law firms are worried about losing their jobs. George would like to meet anyone you know who is worried about their future. He is the Swiss Army Knife they may need.
Lewis Melka of Joseph Sterling is looking for women to host his swapping parties. Lewis is looking at running events in people’s homes, where guests can bring their unwanted jewellery and swap it for cash. Lewis is now our Hatton Garden Tupperware Geezer.
Louise Hassett of Delfont Mackintosh Theatres is looking for concierge or lifestyle management companies to bring their clients for a Carling Black Label with titled members of the theatrical world.
Teresa Kwok is looking for magazines and publishers who may have need for China One Call’s interpretation or translation services.
Neera Menon was Kirsty Joly for just one minute. Kirsty is looking for advertising agencies who may want to use her Perfectly Tempered chocolates for clients. She also reminded us that it is Mother’s Day on Sunday – petrol stations open at 7am. Most importantly, as she was still in Lalaland, she missed us all.
Mike Nightingale of Green Park Insurance reduces admin and cost for clients who have a portfolio of assets to insure. Cars, homes, holiday homes, boats, jewellery – Mike has it all! He would like to meet more people like himself.
Mike Dodd from Michael Dodd Media trains people in how to present themselves well to the media. Mike is currently offering his training in bitesize chunks of two hours at a time, and invites you to send prospects to him for a nibble.
Fiona Gale isn’t interested in switching off lights or turning down your heating to reduce carbon emissions. Well she is, but Only Connect Solutions is particularly interested in working with clients who want to offset their carbon footprint by supporting voluntary projects in the developing world.
Jamie Denham told us how the machine to make sliced bread wasn’t put to use until 15 years after it was invented! Until that point, there was no comparison for how good a new thing was. Sliced Bread Animation would like to speak with companies who would like to make more of their marketing assets through story-telling.
David Coburn of BRX is looking for a free lunch. Or rather a free seat at a networking lunch event or two. Has no-one told him this networking thing just doesn’t work?!
Mab Ayyub is looking for builders and gardeners. Olive Communications specializes in mobile phones and Blackberry devices. Mab can save builders money and can help gardeners put more in their hedge funds.
Caroline Hampstead is a copywriter with a wealth of experience in websites, brochures and TV ads. She would like to speak with ad agencies, design companies and any company looking at producing newsletters.
Leigh Caldwell was then himself for 6o seconds, and for the foreseeable future. Inon has developed a Customer Value Management system, which allows its users to factor in the psychology of buying decisions when pricing their goods and services.
Neera Menon and her team at Educogym are in the business of getting people in shape and giving them more energy. The positive effects of Educogym extend far outside the physical, and in these trying times, that might be just what the doctor ordered.
Zoe Antin of Opus Telecom then delighted us with her ten minute presentation, deserving of a large bottle of champagne – perhaps a Magnum Opus? Zoe told us that she is a Seimens specialist. As such, she is not merely a reseller who could offer you a broad range of products at the expense of any real expertise. No, our Zoe knows her stuff, and what she does know has taken two years to accumulate. Opus is coming up ten years old, and a mark of the quality service that sets them apart is the high percentage of clients they have retained over the years. Opus supplies phone systems, structured cabling, plus calls and access. Opus sells systems that are ready for ‘next step’ improvements – when new stuff technology arrives, their kit is already to deal with it. Finally, great aftercare sets Opus apart. If you sign up with Zoe, Zoe looks after you for the duration. Isn’t that the stuff dreams are made of?